Creating Your Own Rules: A Blueprint for a Life That Works for You

We're often given a blueprint for life that looks something like this: go to school, get a 9-to-5 job, climb the corporate ladder, and retire at 65. For a long time, this was considered the only path to success. But for many, especially those of us who are neurodivergent, this conventional blueprint feels less like a guide and more like a cage. We're wired to think, feel, and create in a way that doesn't always fit into neat, tidy boxes. So, why are we still trying to force ourselves into them?

The truth is, your unique wiring isn't a flaw to be corrected—it’s the source of your greatest strengths. The first step to creating a life that works for you is to stop trying to follow someone else's rules and start designing your own. It's time to create your own blueprint.

Step 1: Identify Your Unique Operating System

The first and most important step is to understand yourself. What do you need to thrive? Think about things like:

• Your energy: Are you a morning person or a night owl? When are you most focused and creative?

• Your environment: Do you thrive in a quiet space or a bustling, collaborative one?

• Your pace: Do you prefer deep work with long breaks, or a steady, consistent rhythm?

• Your motivations: Are you driven by external rewards or by a sense of purpose and meaning?

Journaling on these questions can help you uncover your core needs. Forget about what you “should” be doing and focus on what truly makes you feel alive and engaged.

Step 2: Build Your Life Around Your Needs

Once you understand your unique operating system, you can begin to architect a life that honors it. This might look like:

• Designing your work week: Instead of a rigid 9-to-5, maybe you work on a schedule that aligns with your energy cycles.

• Choosing your clients: Working with people who respect your boundaries and honor your process.

• Defining success on your own terms: Rejecting the idea that a successful life looks a certain way and instead defining it based on your values, your well-being, and your happiness.

Creating your own rules is a radical act of self-acceptance. It’s an ongoing process of listening, adjusting, and unapologetically building a life and career that are a true reflection of who you are. The blueprint is yours to design, and it’s time to start drawing.